looking back.

October 18, 2012

time really does fly.
the first six months as a new mama I didnt get it.
daily struggles to find my rhythm, people telling me it would pass "in the blink of the eye" and me thinking that, every. single. day. took an eternity.
i didnt have time to blink.
looking back i can see that even though some of the days of her being a tiny soul were my hardest, they were also my most beautiful.
her birth was not what i imagined. far from it {perhaps another post one day}.
piper was born with a heart issue, and silent reflux. the latter took nearly two months to find out. new parents, a baby who screamed 24 hours a day {except for the little moments where she would pass out in exhaustion}. she was only okay upright against us. we were exhausted and had so much trouble staying upright.
reflux bubs also feed as often as possible, it soothes them, both the motion and the milk, then it makes things worse. i was shattered most of the time.
it's hard to remember some days.
looking back i miss her tiny fingers, holding her, moments.
i also pray that the little person to join us in a few short months doesn't struggle coming into this world. that i dont struggle.
looking back is an amazing thing.

♡ ashley


  1. These are such beautiful photos of your little one, those little fingers and that sweet little baby smile:) You are so right those moments in the beginning are so hard and at the same time so precious and then you blink and they are gone, if only they could stay small for just a little bit longer. I hope that the new little bub to enter the world has a calm start, I bet you'll do great and you'll have a little helper too I imagine. xx

  2. It really does fly doesn't it. My first never wanted to sleep (it was exhausting!) It must of been so hard for you having a birth that didn't go to plan and then a beautiful baby with a heart condition and reflux. Gosh...that would have been tough. I hope that the journey is more gentle on you this time. And like Catherine says, I bet you'll do great! xx

  3. I absolutely agree. Time really does zip by. We had issues at the beginning too (the birth was great, the breastfeeding disastrous - my milk stopped on day 10 and devasted me) and I have to admit it's maybe the last month or so that I really feel that I've finally found my rhythm.

    I hope you're new little one has an easier time at the beginning of it's life than Piper did. xxx

  4. Wishing for you a gentle, healing birth and an easier road with your newborn. You will take such knowledge and wisdom with you into mothering the second time around after doing the hard yards the first time. They are lovely photos of your little one. It sounds like your new little babe will be joining a beautiful family. x



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